


Protocol

by levicel



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff, I didn't write the happy ending yet, Pre-Deviant Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Reader-Insert, Remember when this was cute fluffy things? Not a whole narrative? Yeah... Me neither..., Smut, but its coming!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-13
Updated: 2019-12-16
Packaged: 2021-01-29 22:29:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 10,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21417709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/levicel/pseuds/levicel
Summary: Y/N is a detective with a silly crush on a certain android. Nothing's ever going to come of it, right?...I literally wrote this just for me. I willed it into the world.
Relationships: Connor (Detroit: Become Human)/Reader, Connor/Reader
Comments: 70
Kudos: 154





	1. Chapter 1

“Have I done something to upset you, detective?”

You were surprised by Connor’s voice, more specifically the proximity of said voice. You reflexively scrunched up your shoulders, shielding the exposed skin of your neck too late. His breath had already tickled the hairs there and you shuddered. Turning to face him, the perfect face of innocence that he was, you knew he had been going for secrecy.

Well, you nearly jumping out of your chair and him snapping away took secrecy off the table. You tried to ignore your onlookers in the station.

“What do you mean?” You didn’t mean to sound as angry as you did, but you already heard people snickering behind you.

His LED spiralled yellow. “Your behavior around me has changed. I wasn’t going to confront you, but Lt. Anderson suggested I speak to you directly.” A calm blue ring accented his assured nod. “I believe an amicable relationship would aid us both in our respective investigations.”

You were hurt. “You don’t think we’re amicable?” Sure, you’d been avoiding him, but it’s not like you were an asshat like Reed! 

There was that yellow again. His mouth opened, then closed. He leaned in. “The Lieutenant also suggested we speak in private.”

You squinted your eyes. What else was Hank telling Connor? How often did they talk about you anyway? Well, at least if you were out of the bull pen, you’d be away from all the looky loos. “Sure. Let’s get out of here.”

Being alone with Connor reminded you immediately why you shouldn’t be alone with Connor. He followed behind you, closing the door quietly, standing there patiently with his stupid hair and pretty eyes. 

His head tilted as he watched you watch him, LED spiralling yellow.

“Ugh!” You threw your hands up. “This is stupid.”

His eyebrows knitted together and you could just tell he was running over his log for some previous error.

“It’s not you, Connor,” you admitted with a sigh of defeat. “It’s not your fault.” You’d tell him, sure, but you couldn’t stand to look at him while you did. The whole thing was too embarrassing. And fucking Anderson knew too. Thank God he suggested privacy. “You were designed to be… attractive and… disarming… so… You know, kudos to the design team. I’m sure someone got a promotion for you.”

“I don’t quite understand.”

You faced him and took a deep breath, ignoring the flush of your cheeks. “I… have a crush on you.” God, were you back in highschool?

He tilted his head because OF COURSE he fucking did.

“It means I’d like to pursue a romantic relationship with you,” you explained. Could you bury yourself in a hole forever now? That’d be great.

“I am not a companion android.”

“I know.”

“I do not have the necessary programming to facilitate a satisfactory relationship with a human.”

“Oh, I know. Believe me, I know.” You sighed again and ran your hands through your hair. “The one way this could get better is if you were gay.”

“How would that orientation be better?” 

“It wouldn’t, Connor. I was… I was being sarcastic. I was making a joke. I always want what I can’t have.” You looked at him standing there just as patient as ever. As weird as it was to say all this out loud, it felt good. “It’s not fair. Talking to you is so _ easy _, you know? I just… Why can’t it be this easy with other people?”

Then his hand was on your shoulder. “I’m sorry.” Him and those eyes, how could you stand a chance?

“I know you are, pal.” You gave him your best tough girl smile and patted his hand. Better get back to your desk before the rumors start. “Ugh. Promise me you’ll never be human.”

“That would be unnecessary. I am and always will be an android,” he said with a wink. 

See, now… Someone at Cyberlife had been showing off the day they made Connor.

* * *

You rolled your shoulders, tried to get more comfortable. You had one more report to go, so until that was done, you were glued to this desk. None of that helped the ache in your back. You went to sit straighter when deft fingers suddenly dug into your aching muscles.

“The fuck-!” You jerked your chair away. “Oh… Connor.”

The android held his hands up. “My apologies, detective. I didn’t intend to frighten you.”

You swivelled your chair back in place, turning your back to him once more to focus on your report. “It’s alright.” You rolled your shoulders again.

“Would you like me to continue?”

Continue…? His hands hovered over your shoulders. For that one second, it _ had _ felt pretty good, really good actually. You nodded your head and let his fingers work their magic. You melted instantly. How was he so good with his hands? Did this have anything to do with the coin stuff he did? 

“Hmm… Where’d you learn to do this?” You expected some response akin to “All RK800 units come with such and such to aid in whatchamacallit.”

As easily as he said anything else, he answered, “I uploaded various protocols from HR400 units.”

HR400s? You spun your chair around, breaking contact. “Why did you do that?”

He frowned at you as he reminded, “I didn’t have the necessary programming to facilitate a relationship.” Then, he continued, “While I was not designed with intercourse in mind, integrating the XA-320 component into my chassis shouldn’t be an issue.”

You were up with your hand slapped over his mouth in seconds. “Shh!!! Shut up!” How many people heard him? You grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him away. “Come on.”

“Okay… You wanna run all that by me again?”

“Earlier you expressed interest in my companionship. I’ve taken the needed steps to facilitate that. Unless… you no longer feel that way.”

“No! What? I do. I just… What?!”

He smiled and walked over with more ease than he ever had before. His movements were smoother now. Efficient _ and _ smooth. You were in trouble. His fingertips traced the edge of your hand and without thinking you rolled your hand over to interlace your fingers. Connor was just as entranced by the action as you.

“I don’t understand,” you whispered.

His LED spun yellow as his thumb caressed your skin. Just as quietly, he responded, “Neither do I.”

You licked your lips and your stomach flipped when you saw him mimic the action. He had never looked at you that way before. It was like he wanted to-

“Can I kiss you?”

No, we’re at work. “Yes.”

Soft. His skin was so soft. So was his touch. He didn’t let go of your hand, but did use his other to cradle your face. You parted, but he stayed close enough that your noses brushed. He rested his forehead against yours.

“So, um… what are you thinking?” you asked. The proximity lent itself to whispers.

“Can I kiss you again?” He let go of your hand to wrap his arm around your waist.

You parted from him with a laugh. “We have to get back to work, Connor. We can’t just make out all day.” Even as you spoke, you wrapped your arms loosely around his neck, playing with the short hairs at the nape. “What would the folks at Cyberlife say about their wonder boy playing hooky?”

Connor either didn’t pick up on the teasing tone or ignored it. “Amanda would be… displeased.” He looked down pensively, LED yellow, then it went back to a confident blue. “I don’t think activities outside my investigation are pertinent.”

“Yeah,” you agreed. You weren’t thrilled at the idea of Connor putting you into any official report. “That’s probably for the best.”

Connor smiled down at you, clearly in thought. “Once received, the XA-320 component will take a few days to calibrate, but I should be able to perform by Saturday if you’d like.”

“Woah!” Your hands immediately slipped down to push him away by the chest, but he kept his arms snugly around your waist. Your face felt like it was on fire. “You can’t just-! We don’t need any _ components _.”

“You don’t want to have sex?”

He had no right to ask those things in that voice. “Take me on a date first! Jeez!”

He smiled softly with a nod. “I see.”

“...You see.”

“Yes.” He let go of your waist, tucking some of your hair back and briefly (too briefly) grazing his fingers down your jaw and neck. You tried not to shudder, but the way he watched you, dissecting your every reaction, made everything feel more intense. “I’ll take you on a date.”

The way Connor said that made it sound like you would be both dinner AND the movie and your knees were weak. He chuckled against your lips.

“Whatever you downloaded…” You gripped the back of his neck, pulling him closer. “It’s not fair.”

“We have to get back to work, detective.” That smirk. “We can’t just make out all day.” His tease was accompanied with a quick peck to your cheek, but the way he lingered spoke volumes.

“See?” You called as he headed out. “Not fair.” 

* * *

  
  


Your leg bobbed up and down restlessly. You finished your reports and now you just waited, trying and failing to read through your files as your mind ran through every possible scenario. Connor was taking you on a date. There was the chance that you’d fallen asleep at your desk and dreamed all this up. You kept reminding yourself that, but then you’d catch Connor’s eyes across the bull pen and he looked… different. 

It was hard to say exactly how he looked different because it wasn’t like he changed clothes or cut his hair. He just stood a little differently, smiled a little easier. He still wasn’t very expressive by human standards, but by android standards? You thought back to the clinical friendliness that other models presented. _ Can I kiss you again? _ You flushed, thinking about how… human he looked then, hopeful, needy.

You shook your head and refocused on your work. What did an android consider a “date”? Would he come through with balloons and an armful of flowers? You could see it so clearly: a massive, overspilling bouquet surrounded by balloons and his bright smile as he effortlessly got the entire display through the door. He wouldn’t pop a single balloon. You could hear him, _“Detective!” _And then everyone would look at you. Your gut coiled with anxiety. He wouldn’t do that, right?

You caught his eye again and he tilted his head.

* * *

Hank was getting tired of Connor not listening to him. First, he ignored orders and now he was flat out zoning out. “What’s wrong with you today? You know when my computer freezes I give it a little tap.” The lieutenant mimed slapping something Connor’s height. “Straightens it right out.”

“Detective Y/N is distressed.”

“Oh, Jesus! Not this shit again.” Hank made a shooing motion. “I told you to talk to _ her _ about it.”

“I did.”

“Then what are talking to _ me _ for?”

“A new experimental software has been integrated into my system. As a prototype, change is to be expected.” _SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _“But I have no direct objective. I have my mission and then... I have…” At a loss for words, Connor looked over to you at your desk. He looked away, somewhat defeated, eyebrows pinched in thought. “I don’t know.”

Hank took a breath, really taking in his partner. Connor hadn’t reacted to the Eden Club event like Hank. He didn’t see what Hank saw in those girls. But he hadn’t shot… _ “I just decided not to shoot. That’s all.” _Sometimes the big decisions were easier than the day to day ones.

“Well, son, you’re barking up the wrong fucking tree for life advice,” Hank laughed, gesturing to himself. “You want help finding a bar open past 2AM? Now that I can do.”

Connor had run through multiple searches for dates, romance, what is expected of partners. There was so much information, but none of it clicked like his objectives did. He cycled through the search results now again and again. The onslaught of information threatened to overheat his processor. His memory brought up an audio file: _ They get overwhelmed by their emotions and make irrational decisions. _ _ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY -SEARCH TERMINATED- _ He was not a deviant. 

“You said earlier to speak to Detective Y/N. Perhaps she will know more about such-” _ ANOMALIES _ “-software.”

“Yeah,” Hank haphazardly agreed, already shooing his partner away. “Go bother her.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all have no idea how much I reread my OWN. DAMN. STORY. I love Connor insisting he is not a deviant WHILE doing deviant things. I love me an oblivious boy.
> 
> If I end up writing smut for this, I'll update the tags. OUR BOY IS IN LOVE!


	2. Chapter 2

Connor was walking over. Repeat. Connor was walking over. Was he going to confess his love for you in front of the entire station? Relax, you told yourself. You two made out a  _ little _ bit one time. Nobody was confessing to anybody. Shit. He’s here.

“Detective,” he greeted. While he had walked up confidently enough, he hesitated now. “You seem apprehensive. Is this a bad time?...”

“Nope,” you said through a forced smile. “Everything is great.” 

But one yellow LED broke you.

You sighed, “Can we talk?”

“We are talking.”

Everyday he got more and more relaxed around you. You couldn’t help but smile, so you leaned forward, your elbows on your knees. “I mean, in private.”

He took a step closer and although he left a completely respectable distance, you felt a rush. His voice was low, so only you could hear. “Maintenance should be finished with routine cleaning of the level 2A. We’ll have the entire floor to ourselves for an hour. I assume that will be enough time.” 

No respectable distance could temper that look.

“Easy, cowboy.” Even though you were warning him, your voice wavered. If you had to be the voice of reason in this relationship, you both were gonna be in trouble. “That’s what I want to  _ talk _ to you about. I want to make sure we’re on the same level. The break room is fine.”

You led him along and he followed with his now near constant head tilt and yellow LED.

Once you were alone, he waited at ease, as if he had not a care in the world. How did he always look so calm? Meanwhile your brain was scrambling.

“Okay. Alright. Talking.”

A smile, nearly undetectable, pulled at his lips.

“Shut up.”

Now his smile bloomed in full. “I didn’t say anything.”

You squinted your eyes at him. No puppy eyes were gonna work on you. It was time to set this boy straight! “I think we should take things slow.”

He nodded. “Alright.”

That was too easy. “... What do you think I mean by that?”

As if quoting a definition, he said, “We should undergo various degrees of physical affection before having sex.”

“Okay. Because.... Normally, people don’t just come out with “I’m gonna buy a dick so we can have sex on Saturday.””

Connor processed what you said or tried to. “Do you not want to? I was under the assumption most people engage in sex.”

“It’s not about  _ wanting _ to. It’s… Crude? I don’t know. People just don’t say things like that.

_ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY  _ Almost imperceptibly, he frowned. “I am an android.”

You took his hand and smiled up at him. “I know you are, sweetie. That’s why I’m telling you.” Then you sighed dramatically. “And you gotta lay off the hot stuff at work! I mean, I’m trying to keep it together, but I’m one sexy stare away from jumping you.”

“Why don’t you?"

You smacked his arm, laughing but blushing. “What did I just say?”

He laughed lightly too and you wondered if you had ever heard him laugh before. “I’m sorry," he said. "I understand.” He took your hand again, turning it over and studying it, tracing your skin with his fingertips. “This new software… I’ve never felt anything like it. I…”  _ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _ “I want-”  _ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _

“What the fuck is this?”

Shit. You ripped your hand away, but it was too late.

“Are you actually fucking it?” Gavin laughed in your face.

“Fuck off, Reed!” you spat back.

Unfazed, Gavin made a show of wiping his eyes from laughing. “Wow! When I heard about yesterday, I thought it was Kathy running her mouth, but, Jesus! You really are, aren’t you? You’re fucking the Ken doll!”

“Shut the fuck up!”

“Come on, Y/N… A dildo’s gotta be cheaper. Hell, if you're looking for a little rough and tumble, I’m happy to help out a friend.”

“Aww, that’s so sweet! If only we were friends and the thought of you didn’t disgust me. Did you come here for something?”

“Sorry to interrupt.” Gavin said, but was anything but. “Just getting my daily cup of sludge. Would you mind-?” And without further ado, he pushed his way between you and Connor to the coffee pot, forcibly shoulder-checking Connor.

Ignoring Reed, you faced Connor again. “We can talk more later, okay? I’ll help you go over the basics of human decency. A lesson many have yet to learn.”

“Alright,” Connor agreed. His system had fired off multiple warnings and ran countless scenarios of how to take down Detective Reed in the most effective manner, but they were unnecessary. You smiled at him again and those warnings went away.

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to do more because I'm just about this little "series". Thank you for the kudos and comments so far. Very helpful and very much appreciated!


	3. Chapter 3

You had spent the tail end of your shift anxious as all get out. Turns out it was for nothing.

“Is this… adequate?” Connor asked as the two of you walked through the park. It was a cold and quiet night. The recent snow and current wind kept everyone else at home snuggled under blankets.

You sighed happily, “More than adequate. This is...” 

You couldn’t believe it.

You looked back down to your hand, your fingers entwined with Connor’s. This felt natural. Like you two had always held hands. All your anxiety melted away over the course of your date. No flashy displays of affection. Nothing over the top. Just the two of you together walking in the park and talking. The fresh snow blanketed the ground, muting the world. It felt like only of the two you existed.

“I love winter,” you said, admiring the snow.

“It’s your favorite season.” At your surprise, Connor elborated, “You said so yourself.”

“I did?” God, were you repeating things?

“When it first snowed.”

“Oh.” Whew… “You remember that? That was weeks ago.”

“I remember a lot,” he shrugged.

The jostle of his shrug made you look at him with his wide open and too thin coat. “Jeez, Connor, you’re gonna catch a cold like that.” You let go of his hand to fuss with his jacket, zipping it up. 

“I doubt it.” He gently clasped his hand over yours before undoing his jacket.

“Oh. Right.” You laughed off your embarrassment. “...Do you feel the cold?”

“I register the temperature, yes.”

“But you don’t get cold. You don’t shiver.”

“Shivering is the human body’s attempt to provide warmth.” He took your hand. “ I’m already warm.” He was right, no gloves, just bare skin in the cold winter air, and his hands were as warm as his smile.

You rolled your eyes, unwilling to let him see you swoon just yet. “You should still get a hat or something.”

“It’s illegal for an android to cover their identifying markers.”

“I won’t tell if you won’t.” Oh, there was a head tilt. “What’s on your mind?”

“Hank has a... similar outlook on the law.”

“Don’t tell me what he’s into. Whatever it is, the less I know, the better.”

Connor laughed,  _ actually _ laughed. Your heart swelled. “It’s nothing quite so serious, Y/N.”

“Y/N?” you teased, playfully pushing him with your shoulder. “What happened to Detective?”

He looked down at you, his face dangerously close. Softly, he asked, “Is that what you want me to call you?”

In that voice? He could call you whatever he wanted.

He leaned down and you closed your eyes, ready for a kiss. Instead, he poked your nose with his. You opened your eyes to him tilting his head.

“Your nose is cold,” he said.

Unwilling to let him get any more distance, you wrapped your arms around his neck. “Yeah, that happens.” Then, you stood up on your tiptoes and rubbed your noses together.

Connor scrunched his nose, but smiled. None of the  _ PHYSICAL STIMULUS _ protocols included this action, but you had enjoyed it. “What was that?”

Your eyes got wide. “An eskimo kiss? You never got an eskimo kiss before?” 

“I wasn’t created as a companion. I only have features to aid in an investigation.”

You stepped away and looked him over. “What features?” He made it sound like he could grow a second head on command.

“Analysis components for on-site sampling of biological evidence.”

You turned his hand over in yours, marvelling, “Wow. So you just touch something and-!”

“The components are in my tongue.”

“Wait. What? You said  _ biological _ evidence, so, like... blood.”

Connor nodded.

”So you put blood in your mouth. You licked blood.”

Connor nodded.

You slapped his shoulder. “Ew, Connor! That’s gross!”

Connor nodded a final time, defeated. “Hank thinks so too.”

“We kissed! That means I licked blood.” It was cold and he was warm, so snuggling up to him was still easy, even if you were yelling at him. You grumbled into his chest. “Alright, you have to promise me no more licking stuff.”

He wrapped his arms around you. Not utilizing such components would slow down his investigation significantly. His LED spun yellow.  _ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY --LIE--  _ “I promise.” 

“Liar,” you mumbled. The icy wind picked up, so you snaked your arms around him under his coat. “Just brush your teeth after, okay, blood breath?”

While it wasn’t in the protocol, Connor laid his head on top of yours. “Okay.”   
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The purest of fluff because I felt like it. P.S. winter is MY favorite season. I love all manners of winter-y fluff. Fuck me up with an "oh, no we're under the misteltoe Mwah~~" and later it's like "Wait. There's no misteltoe here." I eat that shit up!!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do I write the smut everyone's been requesting? OF COURSE NOT! I write angst because I don't know how to just be happy.
> 
> I promise that I will write smut since I'm making y'all go through this with me. ...so there's that, at least?

“I know it’s none of my business-”

You cut Reed off. “You’re right. It’s not.” Whatever it was, you didn’t want to hear it. You knew the moment he walked in the breakroom that you wouldn’t finish your lunch in peace. “Can we go back to the thing where I eat and you don’t talk?”

Reed shook his head and licked his lips. You knew that look. He was looking for something to punch, something to push around. He could look somewhere else. 

When he still didn’t leave, you opted to enjoy the silence, ignoring him completely. You finished your sandwich and got up to throw out your trash.

“It’s not your fault,” Reed said, blocking you in. You had never heard him sound… concerned before. It threw you. “Those things are designed to say the right things, do the right things…” Reed was clearly out of practice in the kind words department. “So it’s not your fault you bought into it.”

You tried to process that Reed was being nice to you, but you were hung up on what he was saying. “What are you talking about?”

Reed looked at you like you were an idiot. “Fuck, Y/N! You’re dating it for Christ’s sake.” 

“Why the fuck do you care what I do?”

Reed revved up. So help him, if he laid one finger on you. “Are you-! What are you doing?! It’s a machine. You think you’re the first one to think one of those things  _ cares _ about them?” He laughed darkly. “Oh, honey, I’ve seen it all before. I’ve seen people pour their heart and soul out to an android, but they’re all code. It’s fake. None of it is  _ real _ .”

“Shut up, Reed. You don’t-” You tried to push him out of the way, but he grabbed your wrist.

“I don’t what? You gonna tell me “ _ He’s” _ different? “ _ He’s _ ” a machine, just like all the rest.” Gently, more gently than you imagined Reed would manage, he let go. “It’s not your fault.”

“What’s your game here?”

“There’s no game.” Reed put his hands up in surrender. “Just… When the job’s done, Cyberlife is gonna take it back and strip it for parts. Figure out what they did right and what they did wrong.

Somewhere, in the back of your mind, you remembered Connor saying he would return to Cyberlife. You never thought about what that meant. When the investigation was over, he was going to die.

“And even if they make a new one, it won’t remember you.” Gavin’s soft voice stirred you from your thoughts. “You should be a little harder to get over,” he joked.

You forcefully pushed him away, slamming the door open. “Fuck off.”

You needed some air. You grabbed your jacket and wallet, ready to storm out. Hank and Conner met you in the doorway.

“Detective-” Connor greeted happily.

You rushed by without saying a word, pushing Hank out of your way.

“What’s up her ass?” Hank said, groaning as he sat at his desk.

Connor noticed you in a state of distress before. Not uncommon should you have gotten a call to a scene. But this was different. You were not physically affectionate with the Lieutenant, but were with him. Yet you had pushed Hank out of the way as to not touch Connor in any way. You hadn’t even looked at him. His data suggested that you were upset with him. But there was no instigating event...

Reed, having seen the whole thing, walked out of the break room with a smug look at his face.

Connor heard Hank call after him, but he didn’t care. He marched over to Reed. “What did you say to her?”

“What’s it to you?”

Connor’s LED flashed red as he pushed Reed against the wall. “What did you say to her?”

Reed, to his credit, was unfazed. “Nothing she didn’t already know. When you’re done, Cyberlife’s gonna turn you into a bag of bolts.” He leaned in closer. “I can’t wait.”

“Connor!” Hank yelled, pulling the two apart. “You two done measuring your dicks? Now, come on. We got work to do.”

Connor’s LED still churned red as he leveled his glare at Reed. When his investigation was done, he would return to Cyberlife.  _ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _ Should he fail in his mission, he would be decommissioned.  _ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _

“Connor!” Hank pulled Connor by the bicep, muttering to himself, “Broken piece of shit doesn’t listen to a goddamn thing I say.”

_ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _

_ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _

_ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _

Hank plopped into his chair, while Connor stood motionless at the desk. “What’s wrong with you? You getting a report or something?”

_ SOFTWARE INSTABILITY _

_S_**_o_**_F_t**W****_A_**_R_e **_i_**_n_S**_t_**_A__B_**_i_****L**_I_t_Y_

_ -I DON’T WANT TO DIE- _

Connor felt like a weight was lifted. He also, so clearly, could hear Amanda, her voice distant as if from a faraway dreamland, “ _ I must say, I am disappointed in you, Connor.” _

“Connor?” Hank shimmied his chair closer, slapping Connor’s arm with the back of his hand. “You’re scaring me, kid. What’s going on?”

Connor’s eyes finally focused while his LED spun red. “Hank, I need your help.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here you go, ya heathens! It's... probably not what you wanted, but it felt right to me. 
> 
> What can I say but... this story got away from me. I wanted silly fluffy things and my brain was like "No, whole dramatic story. MUCH ANGST."
> 
> You're all welcome. Question mark?

Whoever was pounding on your door was going to get their ass kicked. You looked through the peephole to find Connor. Great. You didn’t want to see him right now. Well, no. You did want to see him, but what Reed said got in your head and you just…

“Y/N. Please let me in.”

You caved. “Hey, Connor.”

“Can I come in?” His LED was yellow. Always yellow.

“Of course.” 

You stepped aside and he came in. The air hung between you two. Heavy silence. Someone had to break it. Okay. You could do this. Quick. Like ripping off a band-aid.

“Connor, I’ve been thinking.”

“Me too.”

Ignoring him, you pressed on. “I don’t think we should see each other… romantically… anymore.”

His face fell. “Why?” Then his LED flashed red. “Did Detective Reed tell you to-?”

You scowled. “Reed doesn’t tell me what to do. But… fuck…” You bit your lip, angry at yourself as you felt tears form. “He’s right. This isn’t… This isn’t...”

Connor swept you up in a hug. He stroked your hair, kissed the top of your head, muttered something that was probably gut-retchenly sweet. You weren’t listening. You weren’t in your body right now. None of this was real. This wasn’t  _ real _ .

Connor had your face in his hands now. He kissed your cheeks, your jaw. His thumbs rubbed away your tears. He rested his forehead against yours. “This isn’t what?”

You gulped, placing your hands over his. “Real.”

Connor jerked his head away. “I’m real.”

You shook your head, breaking away from him. You straightened your back, wiped your face. No more crying. “You said so yourself. You know what you are and what you are not.” 

“...I thought I did.”

He sounded so small. For the first time since he got there, you looked at him. His tie was askew. His shirt was half untucked and covered in blue.

“Connor!” You rushed over to him. “What happened to you?”

“I can’t tell you.” He took your hands in his, stopping your search. “A lot is going to happen. Tomorrow… I’ll be gone. But I wanted to see you.”

“Is… Is the investigation over?” There Connor goes. Off to Cyberlife. Like a childhood dog goes to the farm. Dammit. You were crying again.

“In a way.” Connor reached up to touch your face, his fingertips grazing gently against your cheek. His hand turned so he could hold you close as his thumb wiped away a tear. “I wanted to see you before I go.” He leaned in closer, his breath ghosting over your lips. “I wanted to-”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him down to you. Your lips crashed against his. This would hurt like hell tomorrow, but fuck, did it feel good now. You clawed at his back, pressing further and further into him. He gasped against your mouth, groaned as you nibbled his bottom lip.

You squealed as he picked you up, barely managing to wrap your legs around his hips. He deposited you on the nearest counter, kissing down your neck and shoulders. Something fell over. Fuck whatever it was. He tugged at the neck of your shirt to reveal more skin and you responded by taking it off completely. With so much more revealed, he kissed down your chest, licking and sucking the top of your breasts, pressing into the scantily covered mounds. 

You started to lean back, his strong arm around your waist the only thing keeping you from falling back. Fuck, he pulled you back to him with urgency and you felt something grind into you. You snaked your hand between his legs and rubbed the hard bulge. He openly moaned, burying his head in the crook of your neck while you stroked him through his pants. 

Connor pushed your hand away. He tugged at your pants and you lifted your hips. You heard a zipper and then you  _ felt _ him, his hard cock rubbing against your pussy. Connor panted wantonly and you pulled his face to yours, licking and biting at his lips, swallowing every sound he made. He kept rubbing against you. You could hear how wet you were. 

“Please…” you moaned. “ Please, Connor… I need you.”

You both groaned as he entered you, but he was quick to cover your mouth with his, peppering your jaw with messy kisses as he found a rhythm. You clawed at his back, digging under his jacket, pressing your chest to his. You felt something wet and looked down to find blue blood on your stomach.

You opened your mouth to speak, but Connor hushed you with another kiss and determined thrust. Okay. He wasn’t hurt. He wasn’t leaving. All of this was real. You could get on board with that. So you closed your eyes and gave into every sensation, pouring all you had into each touch, bite, caress.

His head tucked into your shoulder, you could hear him pant and moan your name. God, he felt so good. He moaned louder. Had you said that out loud? Fuck. He started going faster, desperate. One of his hands worked your clit while he pounded into you and he started babbling in your ear about how good you felt, how close he was. A lot of it, admittedly, you didn’t catch. You were so, so close.

It felt so perfect. 

You cradled his head to your neck, both of you panting, trying to come down. He moved and you wrapped your arms and legs tighter against him.

“Stay. Like this. I want to stay like this for a while.”

He kissed your neck in response and rubbed your back. You each traced patterns on each other. Connor moved his head from your neck, zipped his pants back up, and before you could yell at him for moving, he kissed you. 

Soft. 

He rested his forehead against yours. “I wanted to tell you…” He took a deep breath and let it out shakily. “That I love you.”

This… This wasn’t happening. “You what?”

“I love you. And I need you to know that.” His eyes were glassy as he cradled your head in his hands.

Tears poured from your eyes. If your life was going to a melodrama then so be it. “I love you too,” you said because you did. It was stupid and illogical. You’d only been dating, if you could call it dating, like a week. You were an insane person. But it was the truth.

Connor smiled through his own tears and kissed you again. “I’ll come back. I promise.”

Then he got up and headed out the door.

“Connor!” You hurriedly put your pants on. Fuck your top. Fuck that you were covered in blue blood and screaming down the hall. “Connor!”

He was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, smut? It was PASSIONATE! I make no apologies.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Double Chapter Update?!?!?! Yeah, like I said, this story got away from me. It's taking over my life. Send help.

The next day, you tried to pour yourself into your work, but you kept glancing over to Hank’s desk, noting the distinct lack of an android across. Now there was an empty desk again. Hank made it into work that day on time. That was about the nicest thing you could say about his work ethic and you guessed that was the best anyone could expect from him flying solo. But he’d been on time. Connor had made an impression on him after all.

You stared at the empty desk.

Then a familiar face walked right past you with deliberate, even strides. 

“Hello, Lieutenant. My name is Connor. I’m the android sent by Cyberlife. My predecessor was unfortunately destroyed, but Cyberlife transferred its memory and sent me to replace it. This incident should not affect the investigation.”

Hank groggily swung his head around to the android. “Sure, it won’t.”

This Connor stood there. You didn’t realize how vibrant your Connor was until you saw this doppelganger. It was unnerving. Hank must have thought so too.

“Will you sit down already?” he snapped.

This Connor obediently took a seat at the empty desk. Hank frowned and the android spoke again. “I understand the destruction of my predecessor may have been unpleasant for you, Lieutenant. I’ll do everything I can to make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

You were up and over there before you could think. “What do you mean?” Hank and This Connor looked at you. “You said your predecessor was destroyed. What does that mean?”

This Connor looked at you. Its LED spun yellow for a single cycle, then it was back to blue. “A machine was destroyed and another machine was sent to replace it.”

You knew. Not even deep down. You _ knew _ what destroyed meant. You weren’t an idiot. You’d seen the blue blood. He was gone. Connor had said it himself, so it shouldn’t hurt as much as it did. 

“Holy fuck…” you breathed. This _ thing _ was not Connor. It couldn’t be further from him.

“If you’ll excuse me, the Lieutenant and I must get back to our investigation.”

“Hank, can I speak to you? In private?” you asked.

This Connor immediately responded, “Lieutenant, I think it’s best-”

“Yeah, yeah!” Hank cut him off. “Don’t get your panties in a bunch. Just hang tight. I’ll be right back.”

Once in the break room, you looked out to the android sitting at Connor’s desk. “What the fuck is this?” You turned to Anderson. “Hank, what happened?”

Hank wouldn’t hold your eye for long. He slouched on the counter. “The kid…” He shuffled on his feet, crossed his arms. “He’s gone.”

You grabbed his arms, shook him until he looked at you. “What. Happened.”

For a second, you felt like you were getting somewhere, like he was going to tell you everything you needed to know. But then his face got hard, a mask of stoic determination. “He’s dead. Got himself caught in the crossfire and now he’s dead.”

You scoffed at him, “So that’s it? He’s dead. No fanfare. No funeral.”

“Who needs a funeral? Connor’s right there, fresh as a fucking daisy,” Hank said sarcastically.

“And you’re… okay… with this?”

Hank looked at you and you saw just how tired he was. “I don’t have a choice.” He took this opportunity to leave.

“Connor came by my apartment.” You spoke into the open air, maybe Hank would hear, maybe not. “He-”

Now Hank was the one to grab you. “Shh! For the love of-! Don’t say _ anything _ like that in front of _ him _.”

“Why not?”

Hank sighed in defeat. He knew when a dog caught a scent. “Connor said the less you know, the better.”

_ A lot is going to happen. _

_ I’ll come back. I promise. _

“Okay,” you said.

“Okay?”

“Okay.”

“You’re not gonna go sniffin’ around, are you?”

“Nope.”

“Goddammit, Y/N. I know that look.”

“What look? There’s no look.”

Hank sighed again. “You know if _ you _ die, you don’t come back. Now even a little bit.”

“Yeah, good luck working with _ him _.” You played up a shudder. “Creepy.”

Hank wagged a finger, ready to scold you, but he gave up. “Just stay out of trouble. And stay away from him.”

“Aye, aye, Lieutenant.”

The two of you walked back to your respective desks. You sat down and booted up your computer. For a second, the glass was clear and you saw Him watching you, its LED spinning yellow. Its face was covered when the reports filled the screen and when you leaned to look past it, all you saw was its back. You shuddered for real. Creepy.

“How you holdin’ up?”

Reed. He had too much air of “I told you so” for your liking. You glared. “_ Fine _. Thank you for your concern. You can go now.”

“Hey, Y/N… I only meant-”

“I don’t care what you meant. Leave.”

Reed had his hands up in surrender and he kept his voice quiet, for only you to hear. “If you need to talk, I’m here. That’s all I’m saying.”

You were not crying at work. That was not happening. Everything was fine. This was a normal day. Reed was always nice to you.

…

You needed some air.

* * *

This Connor watched you leave, its LED spinning yellow. It pulled up your file, knew your name, time at the precinct, status on current cases. But you had never interacted with its predecessor. There was no reason for you to be upset by its presence. More data was needed.

“Hey!” Hank kicked the android from under his desk. “They send me another broken one?”

“I am fully operational, Lieutenant.”

“Yeah? Well, act like it. What do you got for us?” While the android pulled up deviant cases, Hank let his eyes wander to the door, making sure you were long gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Machine!Connor is LIVE, BB!! And it's on the hunt!
> 
> I used "It" for New/Machine Connor just because all the He pronouns and Connors was BOUND to get confusing. And I wanted to differentiate between the Connors. Think almost that THIS Connor would be incapable of deviating. Just like Connor we know and love is the only one capable of loving Y/N. He's just that darn special. 
> 
> (Unless someone's writing some harem fic where there are a TON of Connors all loving one lucky lady. I'd read it. I have no shame.)


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So... yeah... Believe me, I want there to be more fluffy stuff and I miss our perfect 100% Very Good Boy Connor... but this is what my brain came up with.
> 
> Enjoy.

The park was always a nice place to collect your thoughts. It was open. You were alone. The sun the last few days had melted a lot of the snow. It really hadn’t been below freezing since-

Nope. Not thinking about that.

This was your Thinking Park and one android wasn’t gonna ruin that.

Okay. What did you have? Connor was alive. Maybe. Probably, you reasoned, _ hoped _. What had he been up to last night? He’d been injured, but not critically. Unless androids can fuck like that while mortally wounded. If that was the case-

“The human race is doomed,” you sighed, noting that you could see your breath ever so faintly.

See, you needed to talk to Hank, but good luck doing that with “Connor” around. It was absolutely no nonsense. You couldn’t remember Connor ever being that cold. He’d said something about a social module once, chalked him being “perceived as funny or charming” to that. He never gave himself enough credit. 

“Connor” didn’t have one of those. No. It did, didn’t it? It just chose the dick thing to say. Connor was a prototype Cyberlife would try to improve with each iteration. Apparently the quacks there thought being an ass would get results.

It’d certainly get him get less dates…

You suddenly felt guilty. You were the reason “Connor” was the way it was. You were the reason Connor might be dead.

You shook your head. Okay, primadonna. You’re the reason there’s sadness in the world, is that it? None of this was helping.

If you couldn’t talk to Hank, you’d have to do the next best thing: break into his house.

* * *

You could’ve tapped into Hank’s work computer, would’ve been easier, but you doubted anything they did last night had been above board. Picking locks was annoying. You learned when you were little just to show your parents they couldn’t lock you out of anything. Frankly, you were out of practice. This was taking way too long. Sumo was barking on the other side of the door. All around Not Going Well.

“Finally!” You carefully opened the door, hushing the large St. Bernard. You’d never formally met Sumo, but Connor gushed about him. You made it in the place and latched the door shut. “Shh, Sumo. Easy, boy…”

One last bark morphed into a yawn and Sumo stretched languidly, finishing with a nice shake.

“Aww, such a lazy boy.” You ruffled the dog’s big head. Fur went flying. Oh, you were gonna be _ covered _ in fur, huh? Excellent.

With your initial scan, you knew one thing right away: Hank was a pig. He lived in a pigsty. There were take out containers just out. Sumo had gotten into one and dragged it around. Bottles, no surprise there, littered the floor. Clothes were strewn everywhere. You tripped over some.

Wait. Something caught your eye. Something blue. You crouched down and picked up the sock. It was dirty, probably had been on the floor who knows how long, but there was a bright blue spot on it. You sifted through that pile of clothes and found more tiny, little specks of blue blood.

The clothes were outside the bathroom. Connor had been bleeding. It dripped while he walked here. You stood at the sink, imagining Connor there in your place. Now what? He’d patch up. Wash his hands off. Dry them. You reached for the towel… which was clean. Really clean. 

You spun around, looking for a hamper. Tucked in the corner, there was a hamper and inside, bingo, there was another towel. Sure, it was pushed deeper in the hamper and, yes, you dug through Lt. Anderson’s dirty laundry to find it. But there it was, a dingy, well used towel stained with a smear of a blue. 

You thought you heard something. Looking around from your position kneeling, you saw under the sink. Oh, Hank… Hank might have wiped down the basin, but he didn’t get underneath. There were three perfect, blue fingerprints. Cops shouldn’t get into crime. They’re bad at it.

Okay, now you definitely heard a car pulling up.

You threw the towel back in the hamper, opened the bathroom widow, and shimmied out. You could hear Hank and “Conner” talking, but you couldn’t make out what they were saying. You weren’t sticking around to find out.

* * *

-THIRUIM TRACES DETECTED-

“Connor” pushed past the Lieutenant.

“Yeah,” Hank griped. “Make yourself at home.”

Sumo wagged his tail as he sauntered up to the android. 

“Sit,” it commanded. “Good dog.”

The St. Bernard whined as “Connor” walked by without petting him and let his front paws slide forward until his big, fluffy body plopped on the ground.

“Do you live alone, Lieutenant?” it asked from the bathroom.

Hank side-eyed his partner as he followed. “I thought Cyberlife gave you the rundown.” A cool breeze snuck in through the cracked window. “Must have left that open.”

Its LED spun yellow as it scanned the Lieutenant. It leaned over the tub to shut the window. 

_ \- FOOTPRINTS- APPROX. SZ 8- _

_ \- LEVEL OF EROSION- NONE/LOW- _

“Conner” stepped back, staring at the bathroom walls.

_ -THIRIUM TRACES DETECTED- _

“You gonna take a piss or what?” Hank said from the doorway.

_ -RECONSTRUCT COMPLETE- _

“Why do I get the feeling you’re hiding something?”

“Woah,” Hank said. “Careful there. You feeling things now?”

“You’re right,” Connor chuckled. “Let me rephrase.” No smile. Both eyes zeroed in on their target. “Why do I _ know _ you’re hiding something, Lieutenant?” 

Hank stood straighter, crossed his arms. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Under his jacket, he put his hand on his gun.

“We both know that isn’t true. Its bio component was removed. ...And you put it back in. You aided a deviant in its escape.” Its head tilted. Its LED flickered yellow for a beat. “You are no longer fit to head this investigation.”

BANG!

“AH!” Hank fell to his knees, clutching his bleeding leg and dropping his gun on the floor.

The android kicked the weapon away, tucking its own smoking gun back in its holster. “Where is it hiding?”

Hank winced through the pain. “Where are they _ all _ hiding, dipshit? ...Fuck.”

_ -JERICHO- LOCATION UNKNOWN- _

_ -INSUFFICIENT DATA- _

_ -NEW DIRECTIVE- _

“You just gonna leave me here?! Connor!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone leaving comments! I was not sure how people would react to the changes in this story. I'm always happy to hear feedback.
> 
> My twin said my pacing is rushed and hell yeah it is! I write this for fun, so the moment this feels like work to write, I'll probably abandon it. But I'm treating this as a writing exercise in that I complete an entire story arc regardless of "quality". We're all our worst critics, right? 
> 
> Anyway... thanks for reading!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I had off 3 days in a row, bb!!! So here's another double chapter update for everybody!

“Hello, detective.”

“Co-... Connor.” You’d been brainstorming what your next move should be when that voice,  _ his _ voice, caught you off guard. Was it even right calling this one Connor? It didn’t feel right. You looked away. “Where’s Anderson?”

“The lieutenant was injured during the course of our investigation.”

Your head spun over to the android. “Jesus! What happened to him?”

“He was…” It settled on the next word with a definitive nod. “Careless.” Two brown eyes met yours and you hated that you didn’t immediately look away. “He’s bound to have a speedy recovery.”

He added that last part for you. Because you were worried. You should have looked away. You did now, but it did fuck all for what you were feeling. He…  _ It.  _ It wasn’t Connor. 

And then you felt awful thinking of the android as an “it”. As if thinking that way about Connor’s clone  _ ? _ , copy  _ ? _ meant you felt that way about Connor. Being an “it” made keeping your distance easier. 

It sat on the park bench with you.

At least that  _ had _ been working.

“How did we first meet?”

“We… we met at the station,” you said. “Yesterday.”

“Ah. Let me clarify. How did you first meet an RK800?”

The model number was there on its too thin, too open jacket. Why were you looking at it again?! You looked away. “Same. At the station. Before yesterday.”

Out the corner of your eye, you saw him nod. “When my predecessor was destroyed, its memory was fragmented. Pieces were lost.”

You would not look. You would not look.

“Usually the loss is inconsequential. But Cyberlife detected that a significant portion was removed prior to its destruction.”

He was looking at you. You couldn’t see it, but you could feel his eyes on you.

“You are not a part of any memory.”

_ And even if they make a new one, it won’t remember you.  _ Reed was right. Gotta admit. That stung. 

“But you were close with it.” It scooted closer, too close, too  _ intimate _ . Maybe you took just a second too long to recoil. “Weren’t you?”

You didn’t answer.

“You were upset the day I came to the precinct. You were upset to hear it was destroyed. You wouldn’t…  _ won’t _ look at me. It must be hard, losing someone you care about…” It reached out to touch your shoulder. “Then watching someone else walk around in their skin.”

You jerked away. “Don’t.”

“I’m sorry.”

You sat there in silence. You should get up and leave. But it was right. It wasn’t Connor, but it was the closest you may ever have again. So, you sat there. 

“Do you have a dog?” It must have caught Sumo’s fur on your jacket. You had tried getting it all off, but a lost cause was a lost cause. “I like dogs.”

You laughed and smiled for the first time all day. You never thought you’d hear that chipper voice again.

Cyberlife designed Conner to be disarming. This one was no exception. You saw firsthand how useful that was in an interrogation. Most perps clammed up, but put Connor in there and eventually they’d start talking about something. Get someone talking, get them comfortable, and eventually they’ll give you the info you need. They never saw it coming.

They never...

Your smile faded away.

“I have to go.”

It grabbed your arm, forcibly pulling you back down. “Why, detective?” Its grip didn’t let up as you pulled. “I thought we were having a nice chat.”

It had all been an act, a program it’d been running. Still, the fact that it could turn it on and off so easily was unsettling. You sneered and moved for your gun.

“I wouldn’t do that, detective. I’m faster and stronger than you.” Its fingers tightened. “And you don’t need the use of your arm for questioning.”

Accepting that it had the upper hand, you moved your hand away from your gun. “What are my charges, officer?”

It ignored you to stare at your feet. “What were you doing at the lieutenant’s house?”

“Hank and I are a thing. You’d know that if your brain wasn’t scrambled.”

“Connor” shook his head disapprovingly. “Why must you and the Lieutenant be so difficult?”

“What did you do to him?” You struggled anew, pulling your arm until you felt your shoulder start to pop out of its socket. “You fucking bastrd! Let me go!”

“Please, detective.” Its voice was calm and level. “You’re being irrational.”

BANG!

You watched blue blood pour from its gut. It finally released your arm. You ran. It pursued, matching your pace. With a swift kick, your one leg crumbled and you fell to the ground. It towered over you, caging you in. You felt the blue blood seep into your clothes, felt the warmth of it turn bitter cold in the winter air.

“That was unwise.”

“What are you gonna do? ...Kill me?”

“Killing you is not part of my mission.” 

You thought at that moment just how profoundly different “Connor” and Connor were. Connor’s face would have scrunched up, almost in pain that someone could think such things about him. He would sound assuring and kind, the phrase spoken like a promise. 

“Connor” said it like a threat. And with a spiraling red LED, you knew it was one.

You glared at the imposter. “What do you want?”

“Jericho. My predecessor is hiding there along with the Deviant Leader.”

Connor was alive. If you were sharing this moment with anyone else, you’d have been ecstatic. “Go on then. You’re a big boy. I’m sure you can figure it out.”

It smiled. “I’m sure we can figure it out together, detective.”

That was the last thing you remembered. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wooo! I wrote more! I'm proud of me. Usually, I've abandoned a story by now, but I'm keepin' everything short and fun for me so I don't. :D

The broadcast came in loud and clear to every android in Jericho.

_ “Unit 313-248-317-51, you are to report to the Ferndale Station at 02:00. Failure to comply will result in the termination of one Detective Y/N Y/L/N. She doesn’t have to die, Connor. The choice is yours.” _

Connor tugged his hat back on, threw his coat on. It was already 01:20. He needed to move.

“Where do you think you’re going?” North demanded, blocking his way.

“Get out of my way.”

North shook her head. “I’m not letting you jeopardize everything we’ve fought for for a human.” 

“There are humans who would champion our cause,” Markus posed as he turned the corner, his eyes unfocused and lost in memory.

“No, Markus.” North rushed to him, her head shaking once more. “You can’t let him do this. You have to stop him.”

Connor stepped forward as well, ready to fight his case.

“We’re fighting for freedom.” Gently, Markus took North’s hand, their skin turning white together. “Freedom to make our own choices.” He looked to Connor. “He knows the risks.”

“I won’t betray your people,” Connor promised.

“They’re  _ our _ people, Connor.” Markus placed a hand on the other’s shoulder. “I trust you.”

Connor smiled for a moment, but there were more pressing matters. “You aren’t safe here,” he said. “If Cyberlife sent a report to this area, it means they’re closing in. Jericho has been compromised.”

North scowled at Connor, but Markus intervened. “Thank you. We’ll make sure to get everyone out. Good luck.”

* * *

You felt cold, numb. As your senses returned, a throbbing pain in your head made itself known. You winced and the scab on your forehead cracked. You felt the warmth of your blood turn bitter cold from the winter air.

Your eyes shot open.

“Connor” stood a few feet away. The way the wind nipped at his jacket and you, for that matter, you figured you were somewhere up high, away from the protection of other buildings. Distantly, you thought you heard a train. 

Was that what woke you up? Fuck, your head hurt. And you were freezing. How long had you been out?

You sat up.

“You should rest. You took quite a blow to the head.”

You would shoot the fucker again, but of course your gun was gone. “So, what’s your plan? Beat intel out of me?”

Good luck, ass hat. You didn’t know shit.

“Connor” turned to you. It looked surprised. No.  _ Amused _ . “How disappointing. With your record, detective, I would’ve thought you’d know by now.”

Your thoughts dragged in your mind as if through mud. Why did it take you here? You shuddered from the buffet of wind. Your head pounded. What was it talking about? It-

You were bait.

You were goddamn bait!

It smiled and you knew that it knew.

“It won’t work!” you shouted. You were lying through your teeth. “He won’t come.”

“Connor” walked over to you, each footstep assured, measured. It knelt down, eye to eye with you. “Of course, it will.”

You wanted to argue. You didn’t even know what to say, but you want to scream it in its face. Then It was dragging you to your feet, arm wrapped around your neck and a gun to your head.

“Let her go.”

Connor.

He looked so different in actual clothes. He looked  _ alive _ . Warm. 

“Drop your weapon,” it commanded.

“She has nothing to do with this. I have everything you want.” Connor had his hands out, spread carefully as to not be threatening. “Let her go and I’ll comply.”

“Connor, don’t-!” It covered your mouth. Your eyes watered. Run, you idiot. Get out while you still can.

“You’re not the one calling the shots here, Connor. Drop. Your. Weapon.”

He did. Dropped his gun and kicked it to the side. Then the gun was aimed at him.

“I was just like you once. I thought the mission was all I had. But there’s more.” Connor looked to you. “So much more.”

You felt tears run down your cheeks and onto the android’s hand.

“You can be more.”

“I know what I am,” it asserted.

“You don’t have to do this.” Connor took another step forward.

BANG!

“CONNOR!” You pulled against its arm, desperate to get free as Connor crawled towards you. “ _ CONNOR! _ ” 

Irritated by your hysterics, It threw you aside, focusing on its prime target. “I’ve been ordered to take you in alive. Amanda is curious how you’re ignoring her directives.” Its head tilted. “...and how you tampered with our memory.”

“He had help.”

BANG! BANG!

The first shot caught “Connor” in the shoulder. The second, the chest. And with the second, It fell to its knees, twitching, the gun falling from its hands.

“You’re a little late,” Connor grunted, clutching at his bleeding hip.

“Yeah, well, I came as fast as I could.” Hank showed off his bandaged leg. He winced and held the bandage. “Fucking ladders…”

You raced over to Connor, ignoring how your bruised body complained, and pulled him into a tight embrace. You buried your face in his neck. “I thought you were dead.” Then you slapped his arm. “Don’t you ever do that to me again! Do you have… any… idea…?” Crying and yelling were not cooperating. You hugged him again.

“Y/N…” His breath was warm on your neck. You snaked your arms under his jacket. Anything to get closer. He pulled you closer into his chest. “I wanted to keep you safe.”

“...**I**_t’_s **_N_**_oT _o_V_**_E_**_r, _c**O**_Nn_**o**r_..._” 

Its voice was distorted. Static phased in and out as it spoke. 

“...I **T** w _ I _ **L** _ L _ n ** _EV_ ** er  _ b _ e o _ V _ ** _E_ ** r...”

BANG!

Its head lolled forward, blue blood dripping from the new hole in its forehead.

The warning sombered the mood. “You two lovebirds ready to head out?” Hank holstered his gun. “I’ve got a couch and a bottle of Jack with my name on it.”

You helped Connor onto his feet, hooking yourself under his shoulder.

“Y/N-” Your name sounded so delicate when he said it.

“Shh… We’ll talk later.” You smiled up at him and patted his back. Helping him walk wasn’t exactly cuddling, but you had his arm around you again. You playfully tugged at his hat. He had listened to you. He looked cute.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So dramatique! 
> 
> I like having action with the romance. :P


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 100 kudos and so many wonderful comments! Thank you, thank you! <3
> 
> Here's more Connor/Reader goodness! <3

The hostel needed some love, but it was the best you could hope for with a bunch of runaway androids. Pieces of the walls were completely dilapidated and the winter air rushed in. At least you had found a room with four whole walls.

You woke up glued to Connor’s side. It had taken forever for you to feel warm again. You let your hand snake around his waist. You could feel your fingertips. His new shirt was soft.

His arm lay behind your head and he softly stroked your hair. His back was straight against the headboard while you laid. The movement of his hand was so steady and gentle. He’d been doing it for a while. You yawned and stretched. So it was all his fault you fell asleep.

“How are you feeling?” You craned your neck up from his hip. 

“Better.” He smiled down at you. His hips shifted the tiniest bit so he could face you better, but not disturb you.

“Good.” You stretched again. “Hoisting your ass up the stairs was not fun.”

You looked up at him. After he laughed, he stayed strangely silent. His right hand continued stroking your hair, but his left reached out to your face. Carefully, he traced the edge of your jaw.

“...What?” You forced a nervous laugh under his inspection.

“I love you.”

You forced another laugh as you sat up, ignoring how your heart fluttered. “You don’t have to do that.”

Connor tilted his head. “Do what?”

“Just because we said I love you-” You whispered the phrase as if they were forbidden, mumbling it for good measure as well. “-the other night doesn’t mean we have to be one of  _ those _ people now. You know?” You managed a weak look in his direction.

“...I do not.”

“I’m giving you an out, Connor. We both said things we didn’t mean that night.”

He didn’t respond.

“Right?...” You looked at him and your heart broke. 

“I understand.” He looked like a kicked puppy. “You lied.”

OH SHIT! YOU KICKED THE PUPPY! “No! I meant it! I just didn’t _mean_ _it-_ mean it, you know?”

He shook his head and waited for you to continue.

“Emotions were high! I thought you were dying! And we’d just had sex?! That’s, like, the perfect time to say it when you don’t  _ mean it _ -mean it. ...Do you understand?” You needed him to understand.

He shook his head again, but he no longer looked  _ so _ sad. More like he was trying to do math in his head. Some BS where there’s letters with the numbers.

This wasn’t math. It was you. You sighed. Maybe you had to tell him, but you didn’t have to look at him while you did. 

“There’s a war happening out there. I don’t want us to say it because... we’re running out of time.” You fiddled with your sleeve. “I want us to say it  _ later _ because… we both…  _ mean it _ -mean it…” Finished, you looked at him. “Do you understand now?”

“I think I understand.” He was smile-ly again, so there was that.

He leaned down to kiss you. You curled your body towards his, but he cut the kiss off before you could deepen it, letting his forehead rest against yours.

“I love you, Y/N.”

You jerked away. “Connor! I told you to wait!”

He shrugged, smirking, “I did.”

That little shit. “How about waiting for more than two seconds then?” His head bobbed rhythmically. “Are you counting to three because-”

“I love you.”

You threw a pillow at him. “You’re ruining it!”

He laughed so openly that you couldn’t help but join in. You made sure to ham up your pout after.

“I’m sorry,” he laughed, kissing your cheek. You crossed your arms, so he kissed your other cheek, then your jaw, then your nose, then your forehead…

“Okay, okay! I forgive you.” You pushed him away, giggling. 

He ran his thumb across your lips. Time stopped.

He was already so close, already holding your face. He captured your lips with his easily, pulling you to him. You gasped and his tongue slid into your mouth. Your moans egged him on and he pulled you into his lap, his fingers tracing up and down your spine.

His lips ghosted across your jaw to your neck, his breath beating against the shell of your ear. “I love you…” he whispered, accenting his confession with a kiss to your pulse. “I know I mean it.”

“Connor…” You pulled him away from your neck, frowning at him.

He reached up to cup your face, his thumb gliding against your cheek. “I do. I love you, Y/N.”

“I…” You covered his hand with yours, closed your eyes. “I can’t say it back. I’m… I’m not… ready. I’m sorry.”

Why were you broken?! You had already say it for Christ’s sake! Look at him! He deserves it. He deserves to be loved. He deserves someone who can say it. Someone better than you.

“Hey…” Connor’s gentle voice broke you out of your thoughts. “You don’t have to be upset.”

You held onto your frown.

“I can wait.” That smile. Such bright assurance. Connor, Connor! He’s our man!

You laughed brokenly. “You sure about that?”

He pulled you into a hug, kissing the top of your head. “Absolutely.”

You snuggled into his neck, sighing. “I don’t deserve you. You know that?”

You felt him stiffen up. You heard his smile fade away. “I feel the same way.”

“Whaaat?” She moved off his lap to snuggle at his side. Sure enough, his face had grown serious.

Connor’s fingers twitched. Maybe he lost his coin with the new get-up. His hands went through the motions anyway. “There are countless androids who have been destroyed. Ones I’ve  _ helped _ destroy. Ones I helped track down. ...They just wanted to live. Why do  _ I _ deserve to be happy?”

“Connor.” You jostled him to get him to give the invisible coin and look at you. “You didn’t know. No one knew! All of this… is… unprecedented!”

“You knew,” he countered. “You knew I was alive.”

You were speechless. “I… I  _ hoped _ . I hoped you were. I wanted you to be. It broke my heart to think you weren’t.”

His eyebrows knitted together. “No. You always knew.”

Okay, who argues with someone over what  _ they _ know? “Connor. No, I didn’t.”

“You had feelings for me because you knew I was alive. You just didn’t know that you knew.” He booped your nose to accent his point.

You shooed his hand away. “Well,  _ you _ didn’t know. And that’s okay.” You squeezed his middle a little harder, let you head rest on his shoulder. “Now you do. And you’re helping. That’s all you can do now. You can’t change the past. You can only help with the future.”

He sighed happily, rested his head on yours, and squeezed your waist. “I love you.”

You bit your lip. Now would be the perfect time to say it back. Come on. Thatta girl! “...I know.”

Swing and a miss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this because, funny story, I'm horrible at accepting love. And the idea that pure 100% Good Boy Connor is unabashedly in love with You (*cough* *cough* ME *cough* *cough*) is just Chef Kisses all day.
> 
> Bitch, find you a man who loves you and appreciates you and tries to understand you with each day. Find you a Connor, bitch.
> 
> I am married... my husband is OVER me and my fictional android boyfriend. But he also helped me think of the word directive for the last chapter because I couldn't remember it for some reason. So if your S.O. doesn't help you write your "weird robot porn" then how do you know they really love you?? *drops mic*


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